Me speaking to the eager marketing students at BCIT
Public speaking infront of a group of critical strangers is universally mans’ greatest fear. Personally, I used to share echo this sentiment. I’ll admit it’s something I’ve avoided when possible. I’m not completely frightened per say — in the past I just didn’t feel comfortable speaking in front of a group of people whom I don’t know. My public speaking nerves take over.
Part of my apprehension is value based. If I didn’t have much to contribute, (translation: who cares what some dumbass like me has to say?) why potentially embarrass myself in front of a group of strangers? The risk-reward didn’t seem to check out… Much like how terrified I was starting this blog.
I firmly believe in not talking for the sake of talking – only speak when you truly have something to ‘say.’
The issue is vulnerability — we struggle to step outside the comfort and safety of our daily routines to which we can control.
A transformation
I’ve come to realise I’m in a somewhat unique situation (narcissistic rant coming). I’ve accomplished my goal of startimg a career the social media landscape — making the transformation from full-time amateur athlete / student to working at a upstart tech company.
I was given the opportunity to speak to a group of university students a couple of months ago. The speaking gig was hardly something to boast about, it was a panel with three others. The subject of said panel? How to pursue a career in e business. The audience comprised of Undergraduate Business School students looking to carve out a career in the digital space.
Given that I was in a similar position to these students a year ago — I thought it a great chance to share advice and maybe weave a few tales of my journey.
Sharing and competition ~ #Winning?
Any pre-game butterflies immediately vanished when I introduced myself to the eager students — before i knew it, I even got a laugh or two out of the audience (shocker right?).
Sharing any knowledge I may have is pretty rewarding. Coming from a psychology background, I love to help people — the fact that these students cared what I had to say is a pretty amazing feeling.
Coming from an athletic background, I actually compare public speaking to competing in sport. My mindset shifted to competition mode when the panel started… For some crazy reason I wanted to “outperform” my fellow panelists (who were all amazing by the way).
Simply put… I wanted to win.
Express yourself: The rush = public speaking nerves no more
Starting this blog was terrifying. Much like anything else, there’s a learning curve. Getting comfortable with sharing my thoughts in writing took time, public speaking is similar.
Surprise surprise… like anything else, it takes practice.
The rush I got from public speaking was pretty amazing. I was shocked at the response from the students of my Alma Mater. I’m hooked and I can’t wait to speak more frequently.
Are you scared of public speaking? Does it get easier with practice?
Nice read! This is especially touching to me because I’m working on overcoming my fear of public speaking THIS month (taking a workshop for it). Like you said, my biggest fear is believing in myself and that my message has value to the audience.
I learned that the fear comes from our own ego and self-expectations (at least for me). We think about ourselves being embarrassed, looking stupid or not credible. This makes us think about ourselves only and how we look, and not about the audience. Public speaking should be focused on the audience only and how we can provide value to them if that makes sense.
[oops posted to soon didn’t finish the comment above]
So I have been working hard to share statistics, information, tips and stories when I pitch ideas.
Thanks Ken!
Well said — nice way of framing it with the focus shifting to the audience.
What workshop are you doing (if you don’t mind me asking)?
Of course not! I’m taking a workshop from a guy named Lucas Mattiello from levelupliving.com. There’s 4 workshops each month and I have to say that I have received a lot of value from the first two workshops already. If you’re interested I can introduce you to him. Lucas is a very cool guy and is super dedicated in helping you.
Sounds pretty interesting. Any plans for public speaking opportunities on your horizon?
I don’t have any opportunities lined up; not the lengthy ones at least. I usually pitch my business at the Internet Masterminds meetup, so there’s opportunity to practice there.
The skills I’m learning can also be applied to one-on-one and group situations, such as leading discussions, proving my points with an effective message and story, etc.
Oh by the way, have a look at this video. There’s ton’s of value: http://ecorner.stanford.edu/authorMaterialInfo.html?mid=2991
Gee willkiers, that’s such a great post!
Love this read Connor! Its very interesting how you turned public speaking into a competition! I’ve never thought of it in that way. Public speaking is my biggest weakness and I really look up to you and Ken for working on improving your public speaking skills. Ken has been pushing me to overcome my fear too, which is really scary but extremely necessary! But yea, I hope I can make it to your next presentation!
Thanks Di! It’s definitely frightening slash uncomfortable at first. I think everyone would be better off if they forced themselves outside their comfort zones and really pushed personal boundaries. Those are the times I look back on and realize that its totally worth it.
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Hi Connor,
I also remember getting my first laugh from a crowd. It’s an addictive feeling. As for competition, I think it’s a good thing as a public speaker to use other speakers as a benchmark and try to surpass what their performance. My own biggest gains as a public speaker began when I started speaking competitively. A little bit of healthy competition can be a great way to raise your game!
Interesting hearing this sort of thing from someone else. I can’t help but be competitive with pretty much everything i do these days.
Thanks for the comment Ian!
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